post 4

Now back to Mariam
PS mishtahya a8ayir the color of the writing :D

Gimt min il noom w shift ummi nayma.
knt 3a6shana and i hoped to see a glass of water on the table next to me. laffayt wla ashoof 3li's note.
thinks to self: haaaw? ana ma ra7 akun 8abiya inna a7i6 the note chithe makshoof 7aag kilman chinna its screaming out loud READ ME! 7attan ma shilta min mukana kaan ib mu5ba...
istaw3abt inna ummi ille kanaat ma5tha ihdoomi .
akeed shafita 100%!! i started panicking moo 3arfa shasawii. the minute she gets up btis2alni w il7een sharagi3!!
but i knew that this was the last of my worries...
wain 3li haal walaad wain raa7 3asa ma 9aar fii shay?
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3li

I stopped to rest. the past 24 hours I've been running to God knows where. I keep telling myself inna shnu sawait kaan a7saan 7aag sara bass my conscious kicks in w guilt floods in. 
my throat was dry w ba6ni gaam yi8ar8ir min il yoo3
la7atht inne mu makil wla sharib maay for a long time wla intibaht lay wain rayi7!
 wigaft to look at any signs around wla ashoof inni 3ind messila
mu wagta... akthaar rab3i 3aysheen ib messila inshallah ma7aad minhum yishufni beriduni 3ind sara and everyone ib 7alti chithe
killa gaam a3ari min reeli
oh well, i ran to the nearest Co-op and went in
Sharayt snacks and water bottles to go. 7mdilillah knt yayib il k-net mali 
i swiped, entered my password and continued 6ireeji laay... il9ara7a madri wain.
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2 days later...Mariam's side


5alati la7i'6ow inna 3li is missing w ita9low bil shir6a w gaam yidowroon 3alay.
ummi ma tkalimat 7aag 5alati 3an the note but she did come and face me and this is how it went...
Ummi: yumma 7ayatii do you trust me?
Me: *this is going to be about the note* yes mama bass some things aren't about me so i just keep my mouth shut *na8za about the note*
Ummi: intay 9ajja ib hal shay bass ana ille knt 8al6ana mafrooth...
Me: adrii yumma shiftay the note
Ummi: shloon diraytay?!
Me: theekil marra lamman gmt min ilnoom shifta yammi w ana knt adrii inna ma knt 7a6ita yammi...
Ummi: inzain hatha 8ashmara? maryam goolay il 9ij
Me: *looked down* mama...
Ummi: ya3nii imbala
Me: imbala... bass mama la tit7achayn 3ind 5alati byogaf galbhum!
Ummi: *bites her lip* akeed 
After that conversation she just was silent and away from everyone always alone. it was killing me inside but it's life!
6ab3an 5alti amal, um 3li, is going crazy 3ala finding him. kafii inna sara is still in a comma w il7een wildha il wa7eed yithee3!
il police are trying to find recent actions of him, any one who has seen him.
aside from 3li i was thinking of something I've heard. 
sima3t somethings that are special to the person in a comma can sometimes wake them up. and i was wondering if that would work 3la sara...
lamman knt ib my mid thoughts 5alti amal dashat 3alaina. her face had relief but anxiety. 
5alti amal: ligow shay 3an 3li!
everyone's face lit up to this news.
ummi: w shnu ligow?!
5alti: 6ali3 3indihum inna mista3mil his k-net recently w hatha ya3nii lail7een 7aay w bil q8! il shir6a yayeen il7een w yaybeen il information 3an kil hatha. they're also coming to ask me questions.
my hand is much better and i can use crutches now.
so i took my crutches and went to sara's room.
obviously lail7een bil comma. it's been a daily thing for me to go and tell her everything that's happening. adrii inha tisma3ni i've seen it in true story movies. giltlaha inna ligow recent activity 3an 3li.
then, i felt a light bulb over my head
yimkin itha ligow 3li hatha il shay will be strong enough ib nisballiha ille yigowimha min hal comma
I hoped for the best...